010409_0050
April’s fool..
There’s too many things happened today..
I dunno I should start from where..
I suppose to went to GC to see my room around 9pm and pay deposit to settle my room thing..
But unfortunately, around 8 smtg,
While me and max was still having our dinner at subway,
He received a msg saying that the room ord rent by a guy ..
And he’s moving in tml..
God damn it..
My mood turn totally 360 degree..
I did not finish my sandwich..
The feel is like..
I already plan everything..
I plan when to move, how to move..
What to buy for my room, where to get it..
Everything is well planned..
And now..
The room is no longer going to be mine..
Tears just flow..
Is like..
The thing is almost yours,
But disappear infront of you..
Have I ever ask much from u?
Sometimes, I just hope your shoulder can be here when I cry..
Izzit too much for you?
Due to my upset,
Max try every single way that he could..
And finally,
We found a room..
At block 3..
Is abit far compare to block 1..
Same luckily, same block and same floor with siu ching..
The room was still alright..
Not too old..
So I decided to take up the room..
Then the room thing settled..
I called u 5 times today..
Where are you?
Is already almost 12am..
Is ok..i knw there’s smtg wrong with your phone and you don’t want it to happened too..
But..
Did you ever try other way to contact me?
Just borrow your friend phone to send a sms..
Izzit so difficult?
I cry again..
Remember the nite that u hug me tight telling me you will not let me cry again due to unhappy thing..
I only allowed to cry because of happy or smtg touching that done by u..
I apologize for breaking the promise..
At first,
My plan was move to the room this Sunday..
Which is my birthday..
Building our ai de xiao wu on that special day..
And as u told me..
U could take leave and accompany me whole day..
But now..
For the room im goin to move in..
Is during may..
Will you be free?
Can be still do that together?
Or I am going to move and fix everything without you?
Or I should just ask u dun take leave on my birthday..
So that on the day I wanna move,
U can take leave and help me?
Now, the only thing can make me smile..
Is that night when u carry me from LG running 2 floor to reach car park..
The moment,
I feel like..
Will you carry me forever?
I can’t remember when is the last time I wish there is forever..
It seems like I ord give up on “forever” long time ago.
But..
You make me feel there is a forever for us..
You never knw how much you mean to me..
But I guess there is somebody out there knows..
Coz he realize the changes in me..
You said you will make things clear..
That day u answered her call in front of me..
Telling her you ord have a new gf..
In my heart, I was happy..
But..
Your mood can be change so easily by her..
Just a call that last for a few minutes..
I’m beside u up to hours..
Do I really exist infront of you?
Or..
I just put too high expectation on myself..
Actually I mean ntg to you..
But I tot I mean a lot..
I called you..
Because you ask me to..
I asked : is there anythg you wanna tell me?
You answered : we seldom put down phone this way
I agree what u say..
Then, did you knw what is different today??
Did you ever knw how it feel when a girl wanted to celebrate her birthday so much with someone but that someone told her he did not plan anything..
Although she didn’t expect anything..
But still..
It’s hurt..
I try to think, mayb it’s a lie..
But from your “sorry”..
I knew its not..
This is what u gv me..
Have you ever wonder how am I goin to be happy without you?
Written @
9:54 AM
